Ah studious Bruins, it is with utmost delicacy
and genuine sympathy that we prepare you mentally,
for the week that lies ahead.
Crack open your books as your professors proudly present — your midterms!
I’m..so..stressed!
I’m so stressed!
Have yet to study for this test
Set five alarms to wake up early
To cram material I will not digest
First study chem
Then architecture
I really wish I went to lecture
I should do stuff,
Be efficient
But I’m lacking Netflix,
I’ve gone deficient!
I’m a mess
Myself to blame
“Procrastination” is my middle name
To not score subpar is all that I requuuuuest!
Impossible, how can you
Seem so fine- just admit to
Being stressed,
You’re so stressed,
I’m so stressed
Midterm one
And midterm two
Don’t forget the paper that’s also due
In a night, it’s fight-or-flight that is barely getting me through
It’s so packed whilst in Powell
And everybody wears a scowl
Unplanned napping is without question
Must I really stick to one profession?
I shed a tear, eat a snack,
Update snapchat and Yik Yak
And it’s not news to me,
I could’ve planned aheaaaaad
Come on and drink that espresso
And with good habits, presto!
You ain’t stressed!
It’s just a test
Just make sure to give your best
I’m so stressed
I’m so stressed
I’m so stressed
Class is so unnerving
When professors don’t like curving
But even with a curve it’s pretty scary
Ah, those days of syllabus signing are missed
And now clicker questions make me weary
Can’t tell if I should be at discussion
Lack of sleep is the only repercussion
I must practice, and learn to take exams
It’s not just a matter of studying
Tedious, timed, and crazy
“Dude how was it???” “It’s all hazy”
Always stressed!
Always stressed!
Might have done better if I just guessed!
No calculator — see y’all later
This must all just be a jest!
“I just want challah
And Shabbat”
That is literally my only thought
While everyone’s a’writing,
I’m just stressing, softly crying
Then part 2
Says “explain”
And that’s when I really have to feign
The very little knowledge I may have possessed.
I’ll go and drop my minor
My eye bags? Designer!
Due to stress!
I’m so stressed!
I’m so stressed!
I’m so stressed!
Still so stressed
I’m so stressed
If I pass then I’ll be blessed
Without bliss, how can we stay as optimists,
Yet we’re the best!
With Sparknotes
And with Chegg
And with coffee in a keg
You’ll do awesome in your courses
Writing a paper?
Use all sources
11 by 8!
My cheat sheet!
This whole week has been a feat!
4 midterms, 2 papers, now I can rest!
Signing Bluebooks with respect
While ‘SC is signing checks
They’re not stressed
They’re not stressed
We’re the best
So, we are stressed!
————————————————————————————
Original: “Be Our Guest ”
Composed by Alan Menken and lyrics by Alan Menken
(Performed by Lumière, Mrs. Potts, and various staff of the Beast’s castle in Disney’s Beauty and the Beast)
Lumière:
Ma cherie Mademoiselle,
It is with deepest pride and greatest pleasure
That we welcome you tonight.
And now, we invite you to relax,
Let us pull up a chair
As the dining room proudly presents –
Your dinner!
Be… our… guest!
Be our guest!
Put our service to the test
Tie your napkin ’round your neck, cherie
And we’ll provide the rest
Soup du jour
Hot hors d’oeuvres
Why, we only live to serve
Try the grey stuff
It’s delicious!
Don’t believe me?
Ask the dishes
They can sing!
They can dance!
After all, Miss, this is France!
And the dinner here is never second best!
Go on, unfold your menu
Take a glance and then you’ll
Be our guest
Oui, our guest
Be our guest!
Lumière and Chorus:
Beef ragout,
Cheese soufflé,
Pie and pudding “en flambé”
Lumiere:
We’ll prepare and serve with flair
A culinary cabaret!
You’re alone
And you’re scared
But the banquet’s all prepared
No one’s gloomy or complaining
While the flatware’s entertaining
We tell jokes,
I do tricks!
With my fellow candlesticks
Chorus:
And it’s all in perfect taste
That you can bet
Come on and lift your glass
You’ve won your own free pass
To be our guest
Lumière:
If you’re stressed
It’s fine dining we suggest!
Lumière and Chorus:
Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Lumière:
Life is so unnerving
For a servant who’s not serving
He’s not whole without a soul to wait upon
Ah, those good old days when we were useful
Suddenly those good old days are gone
Ten years we’ve been rusting
Needing so much more than dusting
Needing exercise, a chance to use our skills!
Most days we just lay around the castle
Flabby, fat and lazy
You walked in, and oops-a-daisy!
Mrs.Potts:
It’s a guest!
It’s a guest!
Sakes alive, well I’ll be blessed!
Wine’s been poured and thank the Lord
I’ve had the napkins freshly pressed
With dessert
She’ll want tea
And my dear that’s fine with me
While the cups do their soft-shoein’
I’ll be bubbling, I’ll be brewing
I’ll get warm
Piping hot
Heaven’s sakes! Is that a spot?
Clean it up!
We want the company impressed
Chorus:
We’ve got a lot to do!
Mrs. Potts:
Is it one lump or two?
For you, our guest!
Chorus:
She’s our guest!
Mrs. Potts:
She’s our guest!
Chorus:
She’s our guest!
Chorus:
Be our guest
Be our guest
Our command is your request
It’s been ten years since we’ve had anybody here
And we’re obsessed
With your meal
With your ease
Yes, indeed, we aim to please
While the candlelight’s still glowing
Let us help you
We’ll keep going
Lumière and chorus:
Course by course!
One by one!
‘Til you shout, “Enough! I’m done!”
Then we’ll sing you off to sleep as you digest
Tonight you’ll prop your feet up
But for now, let’s eat up
Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Be our guest!
Please, be our guest!
Wow, that is awesome! Thank you!