Notes: This story is inspired by recent events in the larger world and on campus. The situation in this story is not meant to resemble any one entity in particular.
The views expressed in this post reflect the views of the author(s) and not UCLA or ASUCLA Communications Board.
After the recent attacks on UCLA’s Palestine encampment, subsequent police response, and vandalism of campus buildings, confusion permeated campus. UCLA’s administration found itself paralyzed- unsure how to respond effectively to the chaos that had erupted, and struggling to restore order and a sense of pride. Professors of Middle Eastern Studies were clearly no help, they may have spent years studying Israel/Palestine but hadn’t absorbed the capital T Truth from the latest social media infographic.
As if divinely sent, the voice of reason came forward. The Underwater Basket Weaving Club wove together their thoughts on the situation in an Instagram post, with clarity that no expert or, indeed, anyone who has genuinely studied the situation for more than ten minutes, could possibly provide. All the pieces fell into place. Chancellor Gene Block immediately implemented all their demands and gave everyone in the club a full ride. Seeing the unparalleled moral clarity expressed by the authors of the statement and how opposed they were to Israeli border checkpoints, Block delegated the task of deciding which students were welcome and unwelcome in campus buildings to club members.
Commenting on his decision, Block said, “I saw effigies of me with devil horns, a Magen David drawn on the ground saying ‘step on me‘ and swastika graffiti and knew that everyone involved must be a good-faith actor. I guess I didn’t know how to approach a solution until now.”
When asked about his lack of response to the agitators who attacked the encampment, Block claimed “I saw the fireworks and thought they were pretty. I just figured everyone was celebrating. As UCLA Bruins, I assumed that bear spray was just an ode to our mascot.”
Social media statements by campus organizations have shown the UCLA community what thoughtful, selfless activism is. Instead of uplifting journalists, relief organizations and experts on the ground in Gaza, we are privileging voices and care to those that matter most: student organizations with nothing to do with the Middle East. The Palestinian cause is being exponentially advanced, now that money is going to bail bonds, vegan food, and Plan B for American protestors instead of humanitarian aid in Gaza. In 50 years, when their grandchildren ask how they responded when the siege on Rafah began, members of these student organizations get to say that they were writing an Instagram statement on Canva.
